soundczechfic | (no subject)

Today I bought a bicycle and

thewhiteprophet wanted me to make a post about it. I have been having elaborate fantasies about buying a bicycle for a couple weeks now even though I and anyone who knows me already know that I will ride it two or three times and then never touch it again. I used to ride my bike all the time when I was twelve but, you know, I was twelve. I had important twelve year old business to do at my friend's place and down the park. Now I have the choice to stay home where it is warm reading fic or ride a bicycle, I'm probably going to choose the fic. Sad but true.

Anyway I was really bored so I nagged Sam into coming to see a movie. We wanted to see Zodiac but we were late and it was sold out so we had to see Shrek 3. It was better than I thought but I thought it was going to be terrible, so take that as you will. I was really excited about Justin Timberlake being in it because I now associate him with Kame.

After the movie we realised it was only five o'clock so I dragged Sam to Big W to buy my bicycle with me. I refused to pay more than $100 for a bike I will never use so I had to get one in a box that you partially assemble at home. We had to carry it to the corner where my mother picked us up. "I'm going to tell everybody you made me carry a bicycle," Sam kept saying angrily. She had forgotten to take off the soft felt Shrek ears she bought at the cinema so I didn't find it particularly intimidating.

"FROM NOW ON IT WILL BE KNOWN AS BLADE," Sam said when I took it out of the box. It is purple and silver and says BLADE in ugly bubble letters. I bought a purple helmet too. We discussed getting replacement handlebar grips with streamers but I decided they wouldn't fit. I still really want them.

I enjoy putting things together but I also enjoy complaining about the fact that my father is not here to do it for me because he is working overseas and it is "men's work". Probably if he were here I would make him let me put it all together and then I'd screw it up and he'd have to fix it for me. That would be good though, at least I'd know it was safe. When I took it out of the box Sam stared at it sceptically and said, "That is never going to be put together." She has no faith in me.

"My dad built this whole apartment," I replied. "Do you think he hasn't taught me anything?"

I was completely full of shit though, I have not inherited any of my father's skills. Either has my brother, especially. He had soft, artistic children. Poor dad.

When we were on Skype to my dad he called out to Sam to say, "Has Jessie told you that she was 18 before she learned to ride a bike?" and after that Sam kept harrassing me about it all night. "I WAS EIGHT," I kept screaming. "I WAS ONLY EIGHT." She and my dad are never allowed to be in the same room, they will make my life a living hell. She and my mother already egg each other on and my mother is nowhere near as annoying as my father. He tells everyone about this time I threw a tantrum in Verona and threw myself down on the footpath and this kindly lady stopped to ask me if I was okay and looked at my parents as if they had beaten me. I had a broken toe and Dad was storming around lost and wouldn't stop and ask for directions and we were going to miss our train, I was desperate. I was eighteen. There is something about doing things with my parents that turns me into this complete basketcase brat, I only ever act like that around them, I think because I get frustrated that they won't just let me be in control of everything.

I am trying to remember funny things about the bike but I've got nothing. Maybe check for updates when I've actually ridden it; posts about how I ran the bike into a tree/the river/oncoming traffic, etc.

Threaded | Flat

The box was heavy. :[ The things I do for you. :[

He tells everyone about this time I threw a tantrum in Verona and threw myself down on the footpath and this kindly lady stopped to ask me if I was okay and looked at my parents as if they had beaten me.

I WANT TO MEET YOUR PARENTS. GOD. THE OTHER DAY WHEN YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT HOW YOUR DAD WAS ALL 'WHAT COUNTRY ARE THEY FROM?' AND YOUR MOM WAS ALL, 'OH, THESE GIRLS, WHAT COUNTRY DO YOU THINK?' AND DAD WAS ALL 'LOL WELL JAPANESE PEOPLE HAVE MOUTHS' I FELT LIKE I'D NEVER BEEN CLOSER TO YOU. GOD.

Sweet bike! I am endlessly impressed that you managed to put it together.

PURPLE HELMET RDHTFYJGDHFGJ the bike is so you for some reason. i think it's the purple lolol i wish i could ride a bike :( the first day I was learning to ride a bike, Jimson fell from his bike and poke a hole into his knee with one of those dodgy sticking out bits of the bike. i could see his bone. that was the end of my affair with bikes.

Bicycle. :| When I was a kid my dad was this absolute biking fiend and would force everyone in the family to go biking with him, only we all hate bicycles, so his life is very hard. Last time I was home, he offered to buy me a brand new bicycle with, like. I don't even remember. It was very expensive, especially since I hadn't biked in almost five years at that point. Then he said, "What if we get a guy's bicycle instead of a girl's, since you're pretty good at this and we're pretty much the same height ..." and I was just like, "OH, I SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING." Every bicycle in my family inevitably becomes my father's.

I just woke up and this comment is so incoherent.

Your bicycle looks awesome. I am so envious. You should tell us stories of the bicycle and ~~*Fitz's adventures*~~.

I was really excited about Justin Timberlake being in it because I now associate him with Kame.

whoops.

i meant to briefly reference this story about how awful i behave around my parents sometimes, too, but then as i found myself referencing the history of irish sea crossings over the past 30 years because it felt essential to the narrative, i decided it wasn't worth it.

That's a pretty sweet bike. My brother has one that I ride all the time, but it really, really hurts my ass.

oh wowowowowow. great entry, I am having all these visions, an action manga, if you will, Fitz no Blade, where you have all sorts of adventures of your bike. You NEED streamers now, preferably purple and glittery ones, also a pink horn that you can honk at people. YES.

klsjdfl;ksjdf;klds you family, seriously, is pretty awsome. God. The way my dad taught me to ride my bike without my training wheels was to take me to this narrow strip of sidewalk where I had a sadistic neighbor who planted really spiky plants (they weren't cactus... it wasn't needles ... just sharp leaves...) on both sides for like 12 feet. "Don't fall!! :D" my dad said. Miraculously, I didn't, though it took me like 10 minutes to work up the courage to start peddling -- I kept having these visions of being skewered like barbeque meat.

GANBATTE with your biking adventures!!! I look forward to hearing many exciting adventures to come!

I REALLY WANT SHREK EARS NOW. Your family sounds so cute.

You rock! I'm very impressed by the bike-putting-together-ness. I'd never have been able to do it.

But now you have to ride it. I want to see it the next time we have coffee, tied somewhere near those horse troughs so it can drink the water.

Mum and her boyfriend and my sister always gang up on me when I'm at mum's and try to make me go for bike rides. They're mean and irritatingly fit.

Now I'm sick I get to drink tea all day and use their broadband amd whinge and read articles about sex and religion. My day is the best.

I want to see this bike in action! Take a movie!! and please don't crash :(

My sister delighted in telling her friends last night that I used to eat sticks of butter as a child. I'm sure everyone does it but she was like.. BUTTER GIRL BUTTER GIRL LETS GET THE BUTTER. :|